There are moments that define our existence, make us realize our true talents, and give us clarity for our future. All of that and more has happened to me over the past year. For a while, I felt as if I had lost my voice. I reached for the meaningful words to write and they simply were not there.
I return now to give each of you an understanding of what I have been through and where I am going.
For those of you that don’t know, last year on this exact date, my mother passed away. She had not been sick and it was very sudden, happening over the course of two weeks. It started with a major heart attack which caused multiple complications that led to her passing. This not only rattled my world, but caused parts of me to shut down. Simultaneously, while all of this was happening, I had also started a new career. It was a blessing that I will expand on, but simply put, my life was filled with anxiety on every level. I had to redirect my focus.
When you lose someone you love, there is not a play book that tells you how to cope, what to expect, or how to move forward. Nor can I tell you my path is the right path for you. What I do know is reaching for the light, staying away from the darkness and finding your own strength will allow you to move forward. Each day was a struggle and my heart was heavy with grief and hurt. My mother was not only my best friend, she was my counselor, my cheerleader and my biggest supporter. Her abundant love was a constant reminder to choose happiness instead of depression. To get up and conquer the day instead of crying it away in sadness. So that’s what I did. I got up and got going. Even if I left the house in a sea of sadness, I found strength when I least expected it. Simply getting up was the key to surviving the day, the moment.
One day I made it out of the house, but I was stuck, frozen like a piece of glass. I had gotten up to do my swimming routine, but found myself paralyzed in time once I was there. I can remember staring at the lockers, not knowing if I could take one more breath, much less swim. At that fragile moment, a stranger with a kind soft voice, asked if she could give me a hug. I was in utter shock. How did she know my pain? How long had I been standing there? I was rattled, but she simply hugged me and we both cried. Looking back, I had many of those “defining moments” when time would freeze and a caring person stepped in to help me move forward.
We all have distinct talents that are easily seen by others. These talents are written on resumes, shown in our portfolios and check marked by LinkedIn. Unfortunately, there is no social media platform for “life talents,” those super hero characteristics we all have but might not be as easily seen. My boss, Susie Frazier, is a visionary for seeing creativity beyond the surface layer. She is a true creative leader, and when my mom and I walked into her showroom, I knew something special was surfacing. Not only did she take me under her wing at my most fragile and vulnerable time, but she picked me up and gave me wings to fly. My career path is now blossoming and knowing that my mom got the chance to meet her is forever cherished.
My need to find Joy came in a life form of a little puppy. Her name is Joy Rose and she has filled my world with hope and happiness. If you would like to understand our story, see our journey transform and simply find Joy in every day, follow us at cutieincleveland on Instagram. You can also catch Susie and myself on her TV pilot “Movers and Makers” airing on WKYC, Saturday, March 25th at 7:00pm EST. Can you spot me in this jacket? I wore it in honor of my mom and this blog.
This is and will be my closing blog for Fairy Tell Fashions. This blog needs to live with my mother and her love for me. Her comments, her creativity, and her wit will remain here always.
In honor of Sandra Lynn Sherman, 9.1.51 – 3.9.16. I love you, Mom.
PHOTOGRAPHY: Marsha Gaul
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OUTFIT DETAILS: Jacket – (Anthropologie – similar not exact), Jeans – (Express – similar not exact), Combat Boots – (B.O.C Karel, DSW – similar not exact), Belt – (Anthropologie – similar not exact), Intention Blocks – (Susie Frazier), Mantra Block – (Susie Frazier – LOVE)